COFFEE MACHINE MAINTENANCE PROTOCOL

Meeting 43, Action Item 3

Due to an unexpected malfunction, the coffee machine has stopped dispensing caffeine. The following protocol must be followed to rectify the situation.

Step 1: Power Down

Switch the coffee machine off. Yes, really switch it down. Don't just turn off the lights. You're not trying to be a rebel, are you?

• Power Down: The Art of Switching Off
• Safety First: Hazards of Leaving On

Step 2: Inspect and Clean

Run your hands along the surface of the machine, searching for any visible debris. Don't worry, we won't judge you if you find a few stray grounds.

• Debris Removal: The Art of Not Getting Stuck
• The Surface Science: A Study of Coffee Machine Topography

Step 3: Descale and Refill

Run the descaling cycle, then refill the machine with water. If this doesn't work, call in a professional... or just pretend to.

• The Descale and Refill Protocol: A Guide to Not Getting Your Hands Wet
• The Call for Help: When to Admit Defeat