Article 1, Section 1: We expect you to arrive 15 minutes early for all meetings. If you are not, we will assume you are dead and have sent a search party to find you.
Article 1, Section 2: You will not be allowed to use your phone during meetings. If you do, we will confiscate your phone and replace it with a flip phone from the 90s.
Article 2, Section 1: You will not be allowed to use the phrase "synergy" during meetings. If you do, we will have to call your manager and have them talk to you about it.
Article 2, Section 2: You will be required to bring a minimum of three (3) creative ideas to each meeting. If you fail to do so, we will have to send you to "Idea Generation Bootcamp" to get you up to speed.
Go to Article 3: Thou shalt be nice
Go to Article 4: Thou shalt not be late again (seriously, we're watching you)