By the Oracle of the Realm of Neo-Britannia
On this day, the Oracle shall reveal unto thee the fate of the world in the year 2025-01-09.
And lo, the decision shall be:
**THE FUTURE SHALL BE A NEVER-ENDING STREAM OF PIZZA PARTY FIASCOES!**
For it is written in the ancient prophecies, "The people shall be forever lost in a sea of mozzarella and marinara."
Hyperlinks: See what's in store for October 15th, 2025! | Or behold the glory of 2050-01-01!