COFFEE POLICY
Welcome to the most important page on the internet: the coffee policy page.
Here, we outline the rules for drinking coffee in the break room, including but not limited to:
- No coffee shall be consumed during meetings, unless it's a Monday, and only if the meeting is about coffee.
- No more than 4 cups shall be consumed per employee in a 4-hour span, unless it's Friday, and you've had a productive week.
- No coffee shall be left behind the break room counter. It's like a crime scene.
Violations of these policies will result in the following penalties:
- First offense: stern lecture from the CEO, who is secretly a coffee snob.
- Second offense: mandatory attendance at a coffee taste-testing session, featuring only the worst coffee the break room has to offer.
- Third offense: termination, effective immediately. Don't even think about it.
Questions, comments, or concerns? Contact the Coffee Czar!
Exceptions to the Rule