Welcome to Intern Orientation Week: Where the Coffee is Always Free

Here's the schedule for the most epic week of your adult life:

Monday: Monday Mayhem - Introductions, paperwork, and the first taste of the break room vending machine's "mystery snack packets".

Tuesday: Tuesday Team Building - Get ready for trust falls, awkward small talk, and the company's "funny" team-building exercises.

Wednesday: Wednesday Orientation Olympics - Compete for the coveted title of "Best New Intern" in a series of ridiculous events, including the 50-meter dash to the copier and the shot put of stapler jamming.

Thursday: Thursday The Technical Intro - Learn about the company's cutting-edge technology, including the latest in stapler design and the ancient art of paperclip organization.

Friday: Friday Orientation Frenzy - A day of chaos, confusion, and desperate attempts to remember what you learned all week.