SATISFYING SALES NUMBERS NONSENSE

Our Sales Numbers Are:

1,000,000 units sold last quarter! (We made them buy 1000 units of our "I'm-with-problems" t-shirts)

Our competitors can't even come close to our sales numbers! (They only sold 999,999 units)

Jane is a certified ninja warrior, accountant extraordinaire, and sales mastermind. She can sell ice to the Inuit and make it sound cool.

We're not really sure what's magical about them, but they seem to make sales happen!

They're like wizards, but with more beards and fewer wands.

100,000 units sold to the USA!

50,000 units sold to Canada!

And a whole 10 units sold to Antarctica!