WHEREAS, the members of the Timekeepers Guild have gathered to address the pressing issue of Pizza Overload Syndrome (P.O.S.),
BE IT RESOLVED, that the Guild hereby establishes the Great Pizza Party of 2023 as a national holiday to be celebrated annually on the summer solstice.
BE IT FURTHER RESOLVED, that said holiday shall include but not be limited to: pizza eating contests, pie-eating challenges, and an all-out celebration of the almighty cheese.