Zero Tolerance Lunch Policy

Welcome to the most draconian, the most tyrannical, the most unyielding of lunch policies. Here, you are not just a human being, but a productive machine, churning out lines of code like an insatiable lunch-eating robot.

Rules:

• No eating on the go, or on the move. You will be stopped.
• No eating at your desk, or on your computer chair. You will be reprimanded.
• No talking about food, or food-related things, or anything that even remotely suggests the presence of food. You will be silenced.
• No leaving early, or leaving your station, or taking a break. You will be reprimanded.
• No eating anything that is not specifically approved. You will be penalized.

Fines and Penalties:

Fine:	$10,000
Warning:	Verbal scolding

Approved Food List:

• Approved Snack 1: Tuna sandwiches
• Approved Drink 1: Water with a hint of desperation
• Approved Food 2: Plain crackers
• Approved Drink 2: Coffee with a dash of disappointment

Apply for a Snack Request if you wish to partake in the approved snacks.

Fill out this form if you wish to report your colleagues for their food transgressions.