MEETING LEADERS, LISTEN UP!

Guidelines for the most effective, least productive meetings ever.

• Arrive late, it's a sign of respect.
• Use a flip phone, it's retro-chic.
• Bring donuts, but only if they're stale.
• Make sure to bring up every single topic you can think of, no matter how unrelated it may be.

And remember, meetings are like a never-ending game of "who can talk the most without saying anything."