Due to unforeseen circumstances, our budget has taken an unexpected turn for the worse. Fear not, brave meeting attendees, for we have concocted some radical counter-measures to save the day!
We've calculated that our coffee addiction has been hemorrhaging cash at an alarming rate. It's time to switch to tap water and call it "artisanal" to save some serious clams.
Invest in a state-of-the-art water filtration system for a truly "artisanal" experience. Estimated cost: $500.
Learn moreWe've identified a plethora of meetings that can be safely cancelled. Who needs "synergy" when you can just email?
Develop an AI-powered meeting canceller that identifies and cancels meetings for you. Estimated cost: $2000.
Learn moreWe're talking about selling our soul, not our assets. Okay, maybe not our assets, either. Just... just go with it.
Please fill out our simple form, and we'll consider your offer to purchase our collective sanity. Estimated cost: Priceless.
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