The Great and Powerful Decree Reading of the Ancient Ones

By the power vested in us, we, the Ancient Ones, decree the following:

• Thou shalt not forget to water the sacred plants on the 5th day of every month.
• Thou shalt not speak the name of the dreaded "Taco Tuesday" aloud in the presence of the gods.
• Thou shalt not eat the forbidden food of the Ancients (i.e., anything with mayonnaise).

We, the Ancient Ones, have spoken.

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