Mr. Whiskers' Emergency Contact FAQ

What is the purpose of this page?

This page is for emergency contacts only. If you're not a certified emergency contact, please do not proceed.

Warning: If you're not prepared for existential dread, do not read this page.

Who is Mr. Whiskers?

Mr. Whiskers is a highly trained emergency contact with over 10 years of experience in whisker-related crisis management.

He's available 24/7, except on Tuesdays, because Tuesdays are bad for whiskers.

How do I contact Mr. Whiskers in an emergency?

You can reach Mr. Whiskers via the Whisker-Phone: +1-800-WHISKER-ME

What kind of emergencies does Mr. Whiskers handle?

Mr. Whiskers specializes in:

• Crisis-level hairballs
• Cat-astrophic shedding
• Feline fiascos
• Emergency whisker maintenance

Can I hire Mr. Whiskers for non-emergency services?

Mr. Whiskers is available for non-emergency whisker consultations, but only on Thursdays, from 3-5 PM EST.

Consultations include:

• Whisker styling
• Whisker maintenance
• Whisker-related life coaching

What if I'm not sure if my emergency is whisker-related?

Call Mr. Whiskers' assistant, Mrs. Purr-cy, and she'll help determine if it's a whisker-mergency or not.

Can I contact Mrs. Purr-cy via email?

No, but you can try to find her on Whisker-Book, the social media platform for all your whisker needs.