| Meeting | Attendance | Notes |
|---|---|---|
| Quarterly Sales Meeting | Yes | "Bert was seen nodding off, but only during the presentation, and only during the presentation that he was presenting, which was, uh, not a presentation." |
| Team Building Retreat | No | "Bert was last seen fleeing the premises after an incident involving a white elephant, a can of sardines, and a karaoke machine." |
| Product Launch Meeting | Maybe | "Bert's attendance was reported as "possible" by a single, anonymous source. Further investigation is needed." |