<ประกassistant ## ENEMIES LIST ### The Bribers' Club We're not actually a real organization, but we're working on it. Our motto is: "If you can't bribe 'em, beat 'em, or blackmail 'em, we'll just make something up and hope nobody notices." ### Our Enemies (not necessarily in order of severity of dislike) * [The Caffeine-Free Committee](/meetings/attendees/bribery-department/enemies-list/caffeine-free) * [The Punctuality Enforcers' Union](/meetings/attendees/bribery-department/enemies-list/punctuality-enforcers) * [The People Who Use Too Many Parentheses](/meetings/attendees/bribery-department/enemies-list/people-who-use-too-many-parentheses) * [The Grammar Nazis](/meetings/attendees/bribery-department/enemies-list/grammar-nazis) ### Latest Bribes * We just offered the janitor a 50% raise if he agrees to wear a "I'm With Stupid" t-shirt to every meeting. * We bribed the CEO to install a foosball table in the break room. * We're offering a "free" lunch to anyone who can guess the average airspeed velocity of an unladen sparrow. ### Join Us Want to be part of the most dysfunctional team in the office? Apply to be a Bribers' Club member today!