CEOs for Hire: John "The Tyrant"

Meet the man behind the curtain

John "The Tyrant" is a seasoned executive with a proven track record of crushing dissent and eliminating morale. He's been known to make the tough decisions, like who to lay off next and what flavor of coffee to order in the break room.

Notable Feats:

• Successfully implemented a "no work-life balance" policy, resulting in 90% burnout rate among employees
• Increased company profits by 20% through ruthless cost-cutting measures
• Was sued by 17 former employees for "emotional distress and/or PTSD"

Related Pages:

• Layoff Protocols - Learn how John's approach to downsizing is the key to corporate success
• The John Effect: Office Renovations Gone Wrong - See how John's design tastes have ruined the office space
• The Tyrant's Wardrobe - John's extensive collection of suits - Browse John's extensive wardrobe of suits, all purchased with company money