Zero-Hours Workweek Impact
In a shocking twist, our fearless leader, "The Great Dictator," has declared that the traditional 40-hour workweek is not only optional but mandatory. Employees are now expected to work 40 hours non-stop, with a 1-hour break every 10 hours to "recharge" with a Red Bull energy drink and a bag of stale Cheetos.
The impact of this decision has been immediate and devastating. Productivity has plummeted, as employees are now too tired to focus on anything but their fantasy football draft.
The company's stock price has also taken a hit, as investors are now too busy playing Fortnite to care about quarterly earnings.
Despite the chaos, employees are still expected to attend daily "stand-up" meetings, where they are forced to listen to their manager's inane jokes and awkward silences.
To make matters worse, the break room is now a vending machine, and the only beverage options are Diet Coke and tap water with a hint of despair.
See proposed solutions to this crisis.