Q: Why do our meetings never end?
A: It's because we're allergic to productivity.
Q: Can I bring my lunch to the meeting?
A: No, you'll just get caught in the crossfire of passive-aggressive comments about the vending machine.
Q: What's the deal with the copier jamming every hour on the hour?
A: It's not just a coincidence. It's a carefully crafted distraction from the existential crisis we're all facing.
Q: Can I leave early?
A: Ha! You think you can just waltz in here and out again without suffering the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune?
Q: Why do the fluorescent lights flicker in sync with the meetings?
A: It's just the universe's way of telling us that we're trapped in this never-ending cycle of meetings.