EMERGENCY PRETZEL RATIONING PLAN
Action Items:
- Establish Pretzel Emergency Response Team (P-ERT)
- Ration pretzel supply to 2/3 of current consumption
- Implement Pretzel Priority System (PPS)
Pretzel Priority System:
- Ambassadors and Diplomats: 1 pretzel per person per hour
- Key Staff: 2 pretzels per person per hour
- Everyone Else: 0 PRETZELS
Why bother with pretzel rationing? Because Pretzel-typer's Syndrome is REAL! Don't believe the skeptics. Learn more
Stay informed: Follow Pretzel-Alert for updates on pretzel shortages
Report a Pretzel-typer: Submit your claim