Welcome to the Financial Apocalypse Symposium, where the world's top economists, financial wizards, and professional doom-mongers gather to discuss the impending collapse of society.
Our esteemed panel of experts will delve into the intricacies of economic Armageddon, from the impending collapse of the global currency markets to the optimal strategy for survival in a world where the only thing that matters is the price of ramen noodles.
Join us for:
Ramen Noodle Derivatives: Investing in the Future of Food
Economic Golden Coins: The New Standard Unit of Exchange
Financial Zombies: The Unstoppable March of the Deadbeats
| Schedule | Speaker | Topic |
|---|---|---|
| 10:00 AM - 11:00 AM | Professor Pessimism | Why the World is Doomed |
| 11:00 AM - 12:00 PM | Dr. Doomster | The Art of Predicting Catastrophe |
| 1:00 PM - 3:00 PM | The Ramen Noodle King | Ramen Noodle Investing 101 |
| 3:00 PM - 5:00 PM | The Economic Wizard | Creating a Better Tomorrow (or not) |
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