Frequently Asked Questions: Cats on Fire

Q: How do I stop my cat from setting off fire alarms every time it sees a laser pointer?

A: You can try using a laser pointer with a red light, as cats are less likely to attack it. Or, you know, just don't move it around near your cat.

More Laser Safety Tips

Q: Why do cats always seem to be plotting world domination?

A: They're secretly reading "The Protocols of the Elders of the Feline Overlords".

Feline Conspiracies 101

Q: How do I get my cat to stop staring at me like it's judging me for eating a whole pizza by myself?

A: You could try feeding it pizza too, or just pretend it's a mirror.

Cats and Food: A Love Hate Relationship

And that's all for today's meeting. Next meeting: "Why do cats have 99 lives?"

See you all next time!