We've all been there: staring at the coffee machine, willing it to dispense the magical liquid that fuels our productivity. But today, it's just not working. Again.
It's like it's trying to drive us crazy! But fear not, dear meeting attendees, for we have uncovered the secrets of the coffee machine's dysfunction.
Is it the water pump that's on the fritz? A jammed paperclip? A rogue software update gone haywire?
We'll get to the bottom of this mystery, but not before we all need a caffeine fix. Luckily, our break room has a stash of emergency coffee hidden away in a secret compartment.
More about the secret coffee stash
Theories on the machine's sadistic tendencies
Are you a closet coffee snatcher? Do you hide away the last cup for yourself? Well, you're not alone! Join our community of coffee hoarders and let's get our coffee fix together!
We've heard rumors of a dark past for our coffee machine. Was it once used in a secret society of evil coffee overlords? Did it once dispense a brew that could control the minds of its users? Theories, anyone?
We'll dig deeper into the machine's past, but first, let's get to the bottom of this meeting...