The Paradox Protocol: A Guide for the Chronically Late

Are you tired of being on time for meetings? Do you find yourself constantly apologizing to your coworkers for being fashionably late? Look no further than the Paradox Protocol.

This revolutionary new system is designed to help you be late, but not just any ordinary late. We're talking fashionably late, with a side of "I meant to be here five minutes ago, but I got stuck in a wormhole."

Our patented (not really) Paradox Protocol uses advanced algorithms and a deep understanding of the space-time continuum to ensure you arrive precisely 17.5 minutes after the scheduled start time.

But wait, there's more! With our exclusive "Temporal Displacement" feature, you can now travel back in time to any meeting that's already started, and rejoin the conversation with a confident smile and a perfectly crafted excuse.

Don't just be late, be fashionably late. Join the Paradox Protocol today!