Management Theory: The Invention of "Work from Home" as a Tool for Control

Our latest management theory: "Management by Remote Control." It's a system where we can monitor your every move, from your keyboard to your coffee machine. Because what's the point of work if not for us to watch you from afar, ensuring that your productivity is always at its lowest ebb.

Our research suggests that the key to success is not motivation, creativity, or skill. No, no, no. It's about being able to see the whites of your eyes from the comfort of our ivory tower.

We've developed a state-of-the-art system to track your every move. Our "Work From Home" program includes:

• Biometric monitoring: We know when you're taking a break to refill your water bottle, and we know when you're sneaking in a few rounds of Solitaire.
• Keyboard logging: Every key stroke is tracked and recorded, because we care about your writing style (or lack thereof).
• Time zone adjustments: We've created a special timezone just for you, because you're clearly not a morning person.

And, of course, our patented "Nag-O-Matic" system, which reminds you of your duties and deadlines with a nice, friendly "Hey, you're not working hard enough" message.

So, join us in our brave new world of "Management by Remote Control." Where the only thing we care about is controlling you, from afar.

Why Can't We Just Pay You in Coins?