Meeting Ethics: A Guide for the Perpetually Lost
Leader's Edition
As a leader, you have the power to make decisions, but also the responsibility to make poor decisions that will be remembered for years to come.
Here are some ethics for you to follow:
- Arrive late, but only if you're wearing a fedora.
- Use your phone during the meeting, but only to check your cat.
- Never use the word "synergy" unless you're talking about a particularly tasty sandwich.
Subpages:
Minute Taker Ethics
Don't be a robot, people!
When taking minutes, remember:
- Use Comic Sans for maximum readability.
- Don't bother with dates or times, who cares?
- Just list every idea, no matter how absurd or unrelated it is.
Related:
Action Item Ethics
Assign action items wisely (or not)
Action items are like tiny little tasks that you'll probably never do, but hey, it's better than nothing, right?
When assigning action items, keep the following in mind:
- Make them sound vaguely important, but not too vague.
- Use lots of buzzwords like "Synergy" and "Disruption".
- Assign to someone who won't actually do it, but it's fun to watch them try.
Related:
Decision Maker Ethics
Decide, decide, decide, but not too quickly, please
As a decision maker, you hold the power to shape the fate of the universe (or at least the meeting).
But don't get too carried away, or you might end up making a decision you'll regret.
So, here are some tips to keep you from going too far off the rails:
- Take your time, but not too much time (we all have better things to do).
- Avoid using words like "synergy" and "disrupt".
- Just pick something, anything, it'll all work out in the end.
Related: