Decree 1: The Officially-Officially Officially Unofficially Officially Official Decree of the Day:
Article 1: The Mayhem Shall Not Be Stopped.
By Order of the Mayhem, we decree that the Coffee Machine shall be fed exactly 4.5 cups of coffee per hour, or face the consequences of Certain Doom.
By Order of the Mayhem, we decree that all meetings shall be conducted with exactly 17 minutes of small talk and 3 minutes of actual productivity, or face the consequences of Certain Doom.
By Order of the Mayhem, we decree that the office supply closet shall be stocked with exactly 4 extra rolls of toilet paper, or face the consequences of Certain Doom.
By Order of the Mayhem, we decree that the CEO shall be forced to attend exactly 4 meetings per week, or face the consequences of Certain Doom.
By Order of the Mayhem, we decree that all meetings shall be conducted with exactly 2 hours of awkward silences, or face the consequences of Certain Doom.
By Order of the Mayhem, we decree that the copier shall be fixed exactly 1 hour before it breaks, or face the consequences of Certain Doom.
By Order of the Mayhem, we decree that all employees shall be required to wear exactly 3 different colored socks on Fridays, or face the consequences of Certain Doom.
By Order of the Mayhem, we decree that the office fridge shall not be cleaned exactly 1 hour before the weekend, or face the consequences of Certain Doom.
By Order of the Mayhem, we decree that all meetings shall be conducted exactly 2 hours before the scheduled start time, or face the consequences of Certain Doom.
Adjudicated by the Office of the Mayhem, 2020-12-02