Item 1: Should I get ripped jeans?
No, Karen, just because you have a lot of cats and a penchant for 80s rock music doesn't mean you need to get ripped jeans.
Item 2: What to eat for dinner?
Karen, you have a fridge full of leftover pizza and ramen noodles, but you've also got a stash of 500 cat food cans. What's the real question here is: do you have enough cat food for the apocalypse?