9:00 AM - Arrival of the Coffee
9:05 AM - Introduction to Suffering (CEO's Welcome)
9:15 AM - Agenda Review (Because We Ran Out of Time)
10:00 AM - The Part Where We Pretend to Work (Productivity Session)
12:00 PM - Lunch Break (Where We All Eat the Same Sandwich)
1:00 PM - The Part Where We Pretend to Not Be on Fire (Crisis Management)
3:00 PM - The End of the World (As We Know It, Probably)