Due to unforeseen circumstances, the meeting will now be conducted with the urgency of a war zone. Please arrive with your A-game, or risk being left in the dust.
**Important:** If you are late, do not attempt to enter. The door will be locked, and the coffee machine will be switched to "SADNESS MODE". In this mode, it dispenses only cold water, with a side of despair.
**Agenda:**
- 8:00 AM: Welcome, and immediate apology for the meeting's unorthodox start.
- 8:05 AM: Discussion of last week's 'to-do list', which somehow managed to double as a 'not-to-do list'.
- 8:20 AM: Unnecessary, yet crucial, PowerPoint presentation on "The Importance of Proper Meeting Attendance".