Item 1: The Great Reorganization
Move all the staplers to the new location.
Because, honestly, who needs a stapler on their desk?
Read moreItem 2: The Merging of Departments
Combine the Accounting and HR departments into one glorious mess.
Who needs separation of powers when you can have one giant bureaucracy?
Read moreItem 3: The Elimination of Fridays
Remove all reference to the weekend day from the calendar.
Because, clearly, the weekend is just a myth perpetuated by our overlords.
Read more