The Paradoxical Meeting Theory

Paradoxical Principles:

• The 3-day meeting rule: The more days you add, the less productive you'll be.
• The 3-hour rule: The more hours you spend in a meeting, the less time you'll have for actual work.
• The 3-minute rule: The more minutes you spend on small talk, the more you'll forget what you came here for.

Absurd Agenda Items:

• Item 1: Discuss the weather (for 30 minutes)
• Item 2: Review the meeting minutes from 6 months ago
• Item 3: Debate the merits of beige vs. white walls

Meeting Theory in Action:

Warning: Side effects may include: increased caffeine consumption, decreased productivity, and spontaneous combustion.