It is alleged that the donuts have vanished under the watchful eye of our fearless leader, Jane. Witnesses report that she was seen lurking around the break room at exactly 3:14 PM, when the donuts went missing.
Subitem 2: The Fanciful Theory of the Alien AbductionSome claim that the donuts were abducted by aliens, who were drawn to the break room's unique blend of stale air and desperation. We will be exploring this theory further, but only after we've finished our donut-less day.
Subitem 3: The Totally-Not-Plausible Theory of the Time-Traveling Accountant