The Worlds Most Elaborate Desk Scapegoat

Meet the ultimate excuse for procrastination, the perfect reason to avoid actual work. Our desk scapegoat, Bertrand, is here to save the day... or rather, here to waste it.

Features

Submissions

Submit a reason, and we'll add it to Bertrand's repertoire!

Current Scapegoats:

1. The cat is plotting against us.

2. The copier is on fire.

3. I left the stove on.

4. I have a meeting with a meeting.

5. I'm allergic to productivity.

6. The coffee machine is possessed.

7. I'm waiting for the muse.

8. The carpet is judging me.

9. The stapler is on strike.

10. I'm on a secret mission.