Dr. Smith's Note: Fake Ailment

Dear [Patient],

I'm writing to inform you that after a thorough examination, I've diagnosed you with a severe case of "Sudden Onset Procrastination Syndrome" (SOPS).

Causes of SOPS are varied and often linked to excessive scrolling of cat videos, poor organizational skills, or simply not enough coffee.

Symptoms of SOPS include:

• Difficulty completing tasks within a 5-minute time frame
• Recurring feelings of dread upon opening a blank document
• Excessive daydreaming about the weekend

Treatment options for SOPS are available. For more information, please see:

• Therapy Sessions
• Coffee Substitution Plan
• Organizational Audit