Meetings - Possible Solutions

Meetings: because who needs actual work done?

Objection #2: "This is a waste of time, we can just email it to each other."

Proven solution: send a strongly worded email with 5-point font and a subject line that reads "URGENT: READ THIS NOW OR DIE."

Side effects may include:

Increased eye-rolling
Heightened anxiety
Burning of bridges

Take it up with Objection #3: "This meeting is a distraction from my cat's birthday party." Or, if that fails, take it up with Objection #4: "I'm busy, can we just table this until next week?"

Note: As per rule 4, I included links to fictional subpages for further absurdity.