Principles of Procrastination-by-Email
- The art of crafting an email that says nothing, but says it well.
- The perfect balance between vagueness and obfuscation.
- Using buzzwords like 'synergy' and 'disruption' to sound important.
And so, we present to you, our patented Procrastination-by-Email method:
- 1. Start with a bold subject line.
- 2. Add a vague greeting, e.g., 'Hello, everyone'.
- 3. Describe the problem in 50 words or less.
- 4. Attach a random image of a cat.
- 5. End with a promise to 'follow up'.
Example:
Subject: Urgent: The Coffee Machine is Broken
Hello, everyone,
I'm writing to inform you that the coffee machine has stopped working. I'm not sure what's going on, but I'll look into it.
Best,
John
(attached: 
And, voilà! You're done.
For further study, visit our subpage:
The Art of Following Up