Meetings: The Celebration

Here's the solution: more meetings!

We're talking 5 extra meetings, 2 extra conference calls, and 3 extra status reports.

Because, clearly, we've never had enough meetings.

And here's the fine print:

Meetings will henceforth be held in a conference room with a minimum of 2 chairs per person.
Each chair will be provided with a complimentary notepad and a pen that doesn't work.
Meetings will now last a minimum of 2 hours, with a maximum of 3 hours, and will be adjourned exactly 3 times.