John was born on a Tuesday, in a house that was not his own. His parents, though loving, were also utterly bewildering. His mother, a master of the ancient art of making a good first impression, would often surprise him with a new pet that would promptly proceed to destroy his toys.
The family dog, a behemoth of a beast, would often take matters into its own hands - or rather, its own teeth. John would spend hours trying to outsmart the beast, but it seemed to always be one step ahead.
As he grew older, John's antics became more and more... interesting. His parents, though patient, began to wonder if they had made a grave mistake in bringing this whirlwind into their lives.
But John, ever the optimist, saw it all as one great, long adventure. And, indeed, it was. He navigated the minefield of his family's affections with the skill of a latter-day Indiana Jones.
More Antics Meet the Parents