Mike's Credentials: The Unofficial Bio of a Self-Proclaimed Expert

Warning: The following information is unverified, unvetted, and utterly unreliable.

Education:

• High School: Diploma of Doom
• Certificate of Completion: "The Art of Google Searching"

Work Experience:

• Freelance Expert: Consultant for Hire
• Professional Couchwarmer: The Unpaid Internship

Skills:

• Expert-level proficiency in Microsoft Word: The Art of Bold Text
• Unmatched expertise in the field of 'I'm Not a Morning Person': The Owl of Wisdom

Publications:

• A collection of moderately interesting articles in My Own Blog

Personal Statement:

"I'm Mike. I'm a self-proclaimed expert. Don't @ me.