Project Kickoff Agenda

08:00 - Arrival, Reorientation, and Caffeination

Team members arrive, reorient themselves to the conference table, and consume copious amounts of coffee. It's a miracle anyone functions at this hour.

09:00 - Project Overview and Goals

Project lead provides a brief, 10-minute summary of the project's purpose, goals, and expected outcomes. Team members nod enthusiastically, pretend to understand.

10:00 - Team Introductions and Role Assignments

Team members introduce themselves, their roles, and their expectations. The project lead attempts to keep the introductions on track, with varying degrees of success.

11:00 - Break, Snacks, and Desperation

Team takes a 15-minute break to recharge, refuel, and contemplate the impending doom that is the project timeline.