Ninja Gear Catalog - Our Safety Officer's Secret Arsenal

Prophet-approved gear for the modern ninja

Warning: The following items are not for use in actual self-defense. They are for purely decorative purposes only. Any use of these items in a real-world self-defense situation will result in immediate disqualification from ninja training.

• Ninja Grenades - For those times when you really want to make a statement
• Ninja Slingshot - A classic, yet still effective, way to keep a conversation at arm's length
• Ninja Mallet - A sturdy club, perfect for, uh, "demonstrative" purposes

Remember, a ninja is only as good as their gear.