Welcome, esteemed members of the Bagel Eaters' Council, to the Bagel-Eating Protocol, article 3, subsection 14.
As per the Bagel Eaters' Council bylaws, all members are required to consume at least 3 bagels per meeting to be considered a "Bagel Eater of the Highest Order."
Failure to adhere to this protocol will result in demotion to Novice Bagel Eater status, which carries severe social penalties, including but not limited to:
For more information, please refer to Appendix A: Bagel-Eating Protocol Penalties
To view the meeting schedule, visit Bagel Eaters' Council Meeting Schedule
Remember, Bagel Eaters of the World, Unity is Strength, but Bagel Eaters are Unity!
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