Welcome, meeting attendees, to the most unnecessary meeting of the year! Meeting Antithesis is where the art of meeting-crafting meets the science of redundancy. Here, we will discuss the finer points of doing absolutely nothing productive, all while pretending to be doing something.

Agenda items will include:

• Reviewing the last 5 minutes of the last meeting, because who needs to move forward, right?
• Discussing the color scheme of the meeting room, because ambiance is everything.
• Deciding whether or not to take a 30-minute break to grab a snack, because hunger is a productivity killer.

Don't forget to bring your favorite pen and notebook to record all the important notes from this meeting. Or, you know, just scroll through your Twitter feed on your phone and pretend to be taking notes.