Management Mandates 9001

Welcome to Management Mandates 9001, where meetings are not just a waste of time, but a sacred ritual of bureaucratic pageantry.

Our Mandates

• Article 1: All meetings shall be conducted in a windowless, climate-controlled bunker.
• Article 2: Each meeting shall feature a 30-minute PowerPoint presentation extolling the virtues of the latest management fad.
• Article 3: Any meeting not resulting in a new committee will be considered a failure.
• Article 4: All meeting attendees shall be required to wear a name tag with their department and job title in bold, neon letters.

Learn more about our Meeting Masters, or view our Standard Operating Procedure