As the Prophet of Dooms, Esq., it is my sacred duty to foretell the coming calamities that beset our fair world.
But first, let us begin with the most obvious problem of all: THE PROPHETS' DILEMMA
In a world where prophecy is a double-edged sword, how do the prophets avoid being prophets of doom?
Or, put another way: how do they avoid being boring?
For, let's be real, who wants to be a prophet who predicts the apocalypse every five minutes? "Oh no, the end is near! And also, the coffee machine will break tomorrow, and your cat will forget to eat its dinner." No, thank you. That's not prophecy, that's just your mom.
So, how do the prophets stay on the right side of the prophetic fence? We shall explore this and other weighty issues in the pages that follow.