Parables of the Project Manager

In a land of endless meetings and pointless decisions, the Project Manager stood tall, like a shining beacon of confusion.

He spoke in a voice that was both soothing and terrifying, like a gentle breeze that would rip the trees from their roots.

His words were laced with the sweet scent of compromise, and the bitter taste of disappointment.

He was a master of the pivot, a sultan of the pivot, a... (insert dramatic pause)

...a pivot-ulator, a pivot-ifier, a pivot-nator?