Welcome to the Prophets of the Apocalypse

Meet the seers of destiny, here to foretell the end of the world... or at least your favorite TV show.

Prophet of the Absurd, Annex 2

This prophet specializes in forewarning the impending doom of your favorite snack food: Snacks of Despair.

His prophecies are always 99% accurate, but only because he's 1% sure of the other 99%.

Prophetic Predictions:

• Global catastrophe by 2025
• Your in-laws will never leave
• The apocalypse will come in the form of an endless loop of reruns of 'The Bachelor'

More Prophets:

• The Prophet of the Omniscient (foresees everything)
• The Prophet of the Inane (only sees inane things)

Don't worry, we're not really the end of the world. It's just a simulation.