Prophet of the Week: Dave
Meet Dave, the Prophet of the Apocalypse, who foretells of the dangers of Tuesday meetings. With his 5:30 AM wake-up call and 7 AM coffee, Dave is the master of the office schedule. His prophecies of doom and gloom have been known to make even the most stalwart employees question their life choices.
Some of his most notable prophecies include: "The coffee machine will be broken," "The copier will jam," and "Someone will eat the last donut."
But don't worry, Dave's prophecies are always followed by a meeting to discuss the apocalypse.