Welcome to the Prophets of the Downturn, where our meetings are the stuff of legend. We've got prophets of doom, prophets of despair, and prophets of utter chaos. Our prophets are not just any ordinary prophets - they're the best in the business.
Browse our archives of apocalyptic visions, doomsday prophecies, and catastrophic forecasts. Or, visit our Lost Prophets page to see our prophets who've gone rogue.
| Prophet Name | Specialty | Noted Predictions |
|---|---|---|
| Bartholomew "Black Death" McSlaughter | Expert in the field of Pandemics | Predicted the rise of the "Sneeze-19" virus and the subsequent collapse of the toilet paper industry |
| Edgar "The End" Eichhorn | Prophet of the Apocalypse | Forecasted the downfall of humanity in 2050 due to an AI uprising, but was wrong about everything else |
Learn more about our ancient prophets or check out our Prophetical Tools page to see how to harness your own prophetic powers.