Void Meeting Attendance: The Art of Not Being There
Chapter 7: The Science of Doing Absolutely Nothing
Welcome, meeting attendees! Congratulations, you've made it to the chapter on doing absolutely nothing. This is the pinnacle of achievement in the world of meetings.
As we all know, the art of void meeting attendance is a delicate one. It requires a deep understanding of the space-time continuum, as well as an uncanny ability to manipulate your way around a conference room without being seen.
To master this skill, we recommend the following exercises:
- Find a comfortable spot to sit and stay, preferably near the coffee machine.
- Develop a keen sense of hearing, allowing you to tune out the sound of your colleagues' voices without actually leaving the room.
- Practice the ancient art of "selective focus," where you appear to be paying attention while actually checking your phone or email.
Advance to Advanced Meeting Attendance