MEETING SLAYING SKILLS

Warning: The following content may cause excessive eye-rolling, spontaneous meetings, and existential dread.

Certification Levels:

• Novice Meeting Slayer: Can attend 5 meetings in a row without falling asleep.
• Intermediate Meeting Slayer: Can feign interest in a 3-hour meeting about "synergy" and "disruption."
• Advanced Meeting Slayer: Can craft a convincing "urgent" email to cancel a meeting at 4:45 PM the day of the meeting.
• Expert Meeting Slayer: Can attend a 12-hour meeting about "inclusivity" and "safe spaces" without losing their mind.